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Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I promised everyone that this week I'd focus on middle-aged women's online dating profiles. Since I'm much more comfortable with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this post. This list is my best attempt at summarizing the results of my informal survey, with some of my own observations based on a little research I ran myself. Disclaimer: if you are a woman between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I'm sorry, really. Free sex dating near New Zealand, Prince Edward Island. Anyway, here goes:

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I can't say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your own bathroom mirror, interval. Seeing a man standing next to an open toilet, or maybe a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the way everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as even though you are doing something interesting (like fishing or watching football). Or, should you not have a selfie stick, take your profile photo the old fashioned way by tapping the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a friend take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In the event you don't have a single friend who can shoot your picture, or you don't own a smartphone, then you likely should not be dating in the first place.

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I am not the only one detecting these trends. Frequently, when I get together with my single girlfriends the theme of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I Have looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with some of these men because I sensed they were extremely nice guys. And let us just say that I was not surprised when they discussed their frustrations with online dating - of rarely receiving e-mails from women, of their emails regularly going unanswered. I liked to catch these men by their shoulders, and provide them a solid (albeit friendly) handshake, while sharing my feelings about their errant advertising techniques. But I've always resisted the temptation to do so out of a anxiety about seeming rude and ill-mannered.

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Some of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a couple gasp-worthy pictures. These profiles can be a wonderful source of entertainment, particularly if wine is involved. But what I find somewhat troubling are some fairly distressing trends I've noted in many men's profiles who seem to be quite normal otherwise. I do empathize, really. Many of us are dating rookies, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a certain degree, uncertain of what the other sex is searching for, or the best way to get their attention. However, these gaffes are so apparent that I think that it's time someone starts a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?

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I've been a member of a popular internet dating service for a little more than a year now, and I have to say that, overall, I'm pleasantly surprised by the characteristic of guys I've met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain optimistic that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I have come across a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-guys-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of manner. Like the man who thought that choosing the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photographs in a room that certainly cried "locked residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his profound urge to meet a girl with young children (preferably lads). One of my all-time favorites however was the man who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still intensely in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was forced to find love on-line (yay us!).

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