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Last week I discussed my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I'd focus on middle aged women's online dating profiles. Since I'm much more comfortable with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this post. The following list is my best effort at summarizing the outcomes of my informal survey, with a few of my own observations predicated on a bit of research I ran myself. Disclaimer: if you are a girl between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Free sex dating near me St. Isidore, Alberta. Anyway, here goes:

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I can not say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, interval. Seeing a guy standing next to an open toilet, or even a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as even though you're doing something enjoyable (like fishing or watching football). Or, in case you don't have a selfie stick, take your profile picture the old fashioned way by tapping the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your auto. Worst comes to worst, have a buddy take an action shot of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In case you don't have a single friend who can shoot your photograph, or you do not own a smartphone, then you probably should not be dating in the first place.

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I am not the only one detecting these tendencies. Often, when I get together with my single girlfriends the theme of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with a few of these men because I sensed they were genuinely nice guys. And let's simply say that I wasn't surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of scarcely receiving emails from women, of their e-mails often going unanswered. I wanted to catch these guys by their shoulders, and provide them a powerful (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my suspicions about their errant advertising techniques. But I have always resisted the temptation to do so out of a anxiety about appearing rude and ill mannered.

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Many of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a few gasp-worthy pictures. These profiles can actually be a wonderful source of entertainment, especially if wine is included. But what I find somewhat distressing are some fairly disturbing tendencies I've noticed in many men's profiles who seem to be fairly regular otherwise. I do empathize, really. Many of us are dating rookies, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We're all winging it to a particular degree, uncertain of what the other sex is searching for, or ways to get their attention. However, these gaffes are so obvious that I believe that it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?

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I have been a member of a well-known online dating service for a little more than a year now, and I need to say that, overall, I am happily surprised by the quality of men I've met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain hopeful that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive experiences, I've encounter a few (hundred) profiles that completely baffle me in a these-guys-certainly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of way. Like the man who thought that selecting the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photographs in a room that clearly howled "locked residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his deep desire to meet a girl with young children (preferably boys). One of my all time favorites however was the man who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still deeply in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was forced to find love online (yay us!).

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