Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I promised everyone that this week I Had focus on middle-aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am much more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this post. The following list is my best effort at summarizing the outcomes of my informal survey, with a few of my own observations based on a bit of research I conducted myself. Disclaimer: if you are a woman between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland region, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I'm sorry, really. Free sex dating nearest Old Entrance, Alberta. Anyway, here goes:
I can't say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your own bathroom mirror, period. Seeing a man standing next to an open bathroom, or maybe a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as though you are doing something enjoyable (like fishing or watching football). Or, in the event you don't have a selfie stick, take your profile photo the old fashioned way by tapping the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a friend take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In case you don't have a single friend who can take your picture, or you do not possess a smartphone, then you probably shouldn't be dating in the first place.
I am not the single one seeing these trends. Frequently, when I get together with my single girlfriends the theme of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I Have looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with a few of these men since I felt they were genuinely nice guys. And let's just say that I was not surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of rarely receiving emails from women, of their e-mails frequently going unanswered. I needed to grab these guys by their shoulders, and provide them a solid (albeit friendly) handshake, while sharing my suspicions about their errant marketing techniques. But I've consistently resisted the temptation to do so out of a anxiety about appearing rude and ill mannered.
A few of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a few gasp-worthy photographs. These profiles can be a great source of entertainment, especially if wine is involved. However, what I find somewhat troubling are some fairly disturbing tendencies I Have noted in many men's profiles who seem to be quite normal otherwise. I do empathize, actually. Many of us are dating newcomers, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a certain degree, uncertain of what the other sex is looking for, or the best way to get their attention. However, these gaffes are really so clear that I believe that it's time someone starts a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?
I've been a member of a well-known internet dating service for a little more than a year now, and I need to say that, overall, I'm happily surprised by the characteristic of guys I Have met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain optimistic that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I've run into a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-guys-certainly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of manner. Like the man who thought that choosing the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photos in a room that clearly shouted "locked residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his profound urge to meet a girl with young kids (rather lads). One of my all time favorites though was the guy who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still deeply in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was forced to find love online (yay us!).
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