Last week I discussed my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I Had focus on middle aged women's online dating profiles. Since I'm far more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this particular post. This list is my best attempt at summarizing the results of my informal survey, with some of my own observations based on a little research I ran myself. Disclaimer: if you're a girl between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I'm sorry, really. Free Sex Dating closest to Mcnab, Alberta. Anyway, here goes:
I can not say it any clearer than this: Do not post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, period. Seeing a man standing next to an open bathroom, or maybe a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the way everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as though you're doing something interesting (like fishing or watching football). Or, should you not have a selfie stick, shoot your profile picture the old fashioned way by tapping the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a friend take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In case you don't have a single friend who can take your picture, or you don't possess a smartphone, then you likely shouldn't be dating in the first place.
I am not the sole one seeing these tendencies. Frequently, when I get together with my single girlfriends the theme of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with a few of these men since I felt they were extremely nice guys. And let us just say that I wasn't surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of scarcely receiving emails from women, of their emails regularly going unanswered. I wanted to catch these guys by their shoulders, and give them a solid (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my suspicions about their errant advertising techniques. But I've always resisted the temptation to do so from a anxiety about seeming rude and ill-mannered.
Some of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a few gasp-worthy photographs. These profiles can be a great source of amusement, especially if wine is involved. But what I find somewhat troubling are some fairly distressing tendencies I Have noted in many men's profiles who seem to be fairly ordinary otherwise. I do empathize, really. A lot of us are dating newcomers, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a certain degree, uncertain of what the other sex is looking for, or ways to get their attention. But these gaffes are really so clear that I believe that it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?
I've been a member of a popular internet dating service for a little over a year now, and I have to say that, overall, I'm happily surprised by the quality of guys I Have met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain hopeful that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I've come across a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-guys-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of manner. Like the man who believed that picking the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photographs in a room that definitely cried "fast residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his profound desire to meet a girl with young kids (preferably lads). One of my all time favorites though was the man who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still deeply in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was driven to find love online (yay us!).
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