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Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I Had focus on middle aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am far more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this specific post. The following list is my best attempt at summarizing the results of my informal survey, with some of my own observations predicated on a little research I ran myself. Disclaimer: if you are a girl between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Cheap Hookers closest to Norway Bay Quebec. Anyway, here goes:

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I can not say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, period. Seeing a man standing next to an open bathroom, or just a toilet paper dispenser, is an immediate turn off. Take a selfie the way everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as though you're doing something enjoyable (like fishing or watching football). Or, in the event you don't have a selfie stick, take your profile picture the old fashioned way by exploiting the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a buddy take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. If you don't have a single friend who can shoot your picture, or you don't possess a smartphone, then you probably shouldn't be dating in the first place.

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I'm not the sole one seeing these trends. Often, when I get together with my single girlfriends the matter of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with a few of these men since I felt they were extremely nice guys. And let us just say that I was not surprised when they discussed their frustrations with online dating - of seldom receiving e-mails from women, of their emails frequently going unanswered. I needed to catch these guys by their shoulders, and provide them a solid (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my suspicions about their errant marketing techniques. But I have always resisted the temptation to do so from a fear of appearing rude and ill mannered.

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A few of these profiles represent arbitrary oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a couple gasp-worthy photos. These profiles can in fact be a great source of amusement, particularly when wine is included. However, what I find somewhat troubling are some rather disturbing tendencies I Have noticed in many men's profiles who appear to be quite normal otherwise. I do empathize, really. Many of us are dating beginners, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a particular extent, unsure of what the other sex is looking for, or ways to get their focus. But these gaffes are really so clear that I believe that it's time someone starts a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?

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I've been a member of a popular internet dating service for a little over a year now, and I have to say that, overall, I'm pleasantly surprised by the characteristic of guys I've met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain optimistic that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I've run into a few (hundred) profiles that completely baffle me in a these-men-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of manner. Like the man who thought that selecting the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photos in a room that clearly cried "fast residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his deep desire to meet a girl with young kids (rather lads). One of my all-time favorites however was the man who spent half his profile story writing about how he was still intensely in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was driven to find love online (yay us!).

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