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Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I Had focus on middle-aged women's online dating profiles. Since I'm much more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this post. This list is my best attempt at summarizing the results of my informal survey, with a few of my own observations based on a little research I conducted myself. Disclaimer: if you are a girl between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland area, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Cheap Hookers near me Prosperity Alberta. Anyway, here goes:

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I can not say it any clearer than this: Don't post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, interval. Seeing a man standing next to an open toilet, or just a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as even though you are doing something enjoyable (like fishing or watching football). Or, should you not have a selfie stick, take your profile photograph the old fashioned way by exploiting the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your auto. Worst comes to worst, have a friend take an action shot of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In the event that you don't have a single friend who can take your photo, or you do not own a smartphone, then you probably should not be dating in the first place.

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I'm not the single one detecting these trends. Frequently, when I get together with my single girlfriends the theme of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with some of these men because I felt they were really nice guys. And let's simply say that I wasn't surprised when they discussed their frustrations with online dating - of seldom receiving emails from women, of their e-mails regularly going unanswered. I wanted to grab these men by their shoulders, and provide them a solid (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my suspicions about their errant advertising techniques. But I've always resisted the temptation to do so out of a fear of appearing rude and ill mannered.

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Some of these profiles represent random oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising narrative or a few gasp-worthy photographs. These profiles can actually be an excellent source of amusement, particularly if wine is involved. However, what I find somewhat distressing are some rather distressing trends I've noted in many men's profiles who seem to be fairly regular otherwise. I do empathize, really. Many of us are dating rookies, jumping back in the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a certain extent, unsure of what the other sex is looking for, or the way to get their attention. However, these gaffes are really so apparent that I believe it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?

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I have been a member of a popular online dating service for a little over a year now, and I have to say that, overall, I'm happily surprised by the quality of guys I Have met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain optimistic that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive experiences, I've encounter a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-men-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of way. Like the man who thought that choosing the username "Undertaker" was a good idea, or the guy who shot his photos in a room that definitely yelled "fast residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his profound desire to meet a girl with young kids (rather lads). One of my all time favorites though was the guy who spent half his profile narrative writing about how he was still intensely in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was compelled to find love online (yay us!).

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