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Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I promised everyone that this week I'd concentrate on middle aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am far more comfortable with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this specific post. The following list is my best effort at summarizing the results of my informal survey, with some of my own observations predicated on a bit of research I ran myself. Disclaimer: if you are a woman between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland region, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Cheap Hookers nearby Camrose Alberta. Anyway, here goes:

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I can not say it any clearer than this: Do not post any selfies of yourself looking into your bathroom mirror, interval. Seeing a guy standing next to an open bathroom, or even a toilet paper dispenser, is an instant turn off. Take a selfie the means everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as even though you are doing something fun (like fishing or watching football). Or, if you don't have a selfie stick, shoot your profile photograph the old fashioned way by tapping the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a buddy take an action photo of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. In the event that you don't have a single friend who can shoot your photo, or you do not possess a smartphone, then you likely shouldn't be dating in the first place.

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I am not the single one finding these tendencies. Often, when I get together with my single girlfriends the subject of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with some of these men because I sensed they were extremely nice guys. And let us just say that I wasn't surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of infrequently receiving e-mails from women, of their e-mails often going unanswered. I needed to catch these guys by their shoulders, and provide them a powerful (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my feelings about their errant promotion techniques. But I have always resisted the temptation to do so from a fear of seeming rude and ill-mannered.

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A few of these profiles represent arbitrary oddities, the one-in-a-hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising story or a couple gasp-worthy photographs. These profiles can in fact be an excellent source of amusement, particularly when wine is involved. However, what I find somewhat distressing are some rather disturbing tendencies I've noticed in many men's profiles who appear to be quite regular otherwise. I do empathize, actually. A lot of us are dating novices, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We're all winging it to a particular degree, uncertain of what the other sex is looking for, or ways to get their attention. But these gaffes are really so obvious that I believe it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?

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I've been a member of a well-known internet dating service for a little over a year now, and I must say that, overall, I'm happily surprised by the quality of men I Have met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain optimistic that eventually, I will. Yet despite my generally positive experiences, I've run into a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-men-clearly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of way. Like the man who thought that selecting the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his photographs in a room that certainly cried "locked residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his deep desire to meet a woman with young children (preferably boys). One of my all-time favorites however was the guy who spent half his profile story writing about how he was still deeply in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was forced to find love on-line (yay us!).

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