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Last week I shared my six pet peeves about middle-aged men's online dating profiles , and I assured everyone that this week I'd focus on middle aged women's online dating profiles. Since I am much more familiar with men's profiles, I recruited some of my single male friends (and the Twittersphere) to help me with this specific post. The following list is my best attempt at summarizing the outcomes of my informal survey, with some of my own observations based on a little research I conducted myself. Disclaimer: if you're a woman between the ages of 45 and 60, living in the Chicagoland region, and I popped up on your "Viewed Me" list, I am sorry, really. Cheap Hookers near me Beach Corner, Alberta. Anyway, here goes:

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I can not say it any clearer than this: Do not post any selfies of yourself looking into your own bathroom mirror, interval. Seeing a guy standing next to an open bathroom, or maybe a toilet paper dispenser, is an immediate turn off. Take a selfie the way everyone else in the world does, by using a selfie stick and pretending as though you're doing something fun (like fishing or watching football). Or, if you don't have a selfie stick, take your profile photograph the old fashioned way by exploiting the reverse camera view on your smart phone and then snapping a selfie in your car. Worst comes to worst, have a buddy take an action shot of you standing alone with a glass of wine pretending to laugh at someone just out of view. If you don't have a single friend who can take your photograph, or you don't possess a smartphone, then you likely should not be dating in the first place.

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I'm not the single one noticing these tendencies. Frequently, when I get together with my single girlfriends the matter of some men's online dating profiles is raised with a collective "what in the world were they thinking??" From time to time I've looked past these profile peculiarities and gone out with some of these men because I felt they were extremely nice guys. And let's just say that I wasn't surprised when they shared their frustrations with online dating - of scarcely receiving e-mails from women, of their e-mails frequently going unanswered. I liked to catch these men by their shoulders, and provide them a powerful (albeit friendly) shake, while sharing my feelings about their errant marketing techniques. But I've consistently resisted the temptation to do so from a anxiety about appearing rude and ill mannered.

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Many of these profiles represent arbitrary oddities, the one-in-a hundred profile with an eyebrow-raising narrative or a couple gasp-worthy photographs. These profiles can be an excellent source of amusement, especially if wine is involved. But what I find somewhat troubling are some rather disturbing tendencies I've noted in many men's profiles who appear to be fairly normal otherwise. I do empathize, really. A lot of us are dating newcomers, jumping back into the dating pool after years (sometimes decades) of marriage and child-rearing. We are all winging it to a certain degree, uncertain of what the other sex is looking for, or ways to get their focus. However, these gaffes are so apparent that I believe it's time someone opens a dialogue and asks the important question: Why? No really, why?

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I've been a member of a popular online dating service for a little over a year now, and I must say that, overall, I am pleasantly surprised by the characteristic of guys I Have met online. While I haven't yet met "the one," I remain optimistic that eventually, I 'll. Yet despite my generally positive encounters, I have run into a few (hundred) profiles that totally baffle me in a these-men-certainly-were-not-raised-with-sisters-and-can't-possibly-have-any-female-friends sort of way. Like the man who thought that picking the username "Undertaker" was wise, or the guy who shot his pictures in a room that definitely cried "secured residential facility." Or, the childless man who expressed his deep desire to meet a woman with young kids (preferably lads). One of my all time favorites though was the man who spent half his profile story writing about how he was still deeply in love with his ex wife, but since she wouldn't take him back, he was compelled to find love on-line (yay us!).

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